Saturday, May 22, 2010

Is wine appropriate to give at a funeral?

My friend has died recently, and he's gonna have a funeral, I was thinking everyone's gonna give his family flowers as gifts, would red wine be appropriate though? If not, what else could I give them besides flowers?

Is wine appropriate to give at a funeral?
I'm a funeral director and personally, I think in this situation, wine is not really appropriate. What did your friend die from? If it was Cancer, how about a donation in his memory to the Cancer Society......or if it was a Heart Attack, a donation to Heart and Stroke in his memory.....or whatever other charity is relevant to his cause of death. If your friend is Catholic and there's going to be a funeral mass, Mass Cards are always appreciated by catholic families. You could give the family a small tree or rose bush to plant in their garden at home in his memory.


Something else that families of the deceased always appreciate is gifts of prepared food, i.e. a big pan of lasagne, cheese or cold meat tray with crackers and rolls. They are upset and overwhelmed with everything that's happened and being able to just warm up a casserole or have something prepared so they don't have to cook is always really appreciated.


Another nice gesture is to write them a little note at Christmas time.....just to tell them you're thinking of them during this first christmas season without him and you hope that all the happy memories they made with him in years past will be of some comfort to them.


There's heaps of other things.......but hopefully this will steer your mind away from the more traditional gifts of flowers.





Edit: to Just a Gorilla! I don't know where on earth you got your information from but you are so so wrong!! All flowers have gift cards on them!! How else is the family supposed to know who they're from to send them an acknowledgement!.


If the family isn't catholic and you give them a bottle of wine and tell them it's the blood of Jesus, they're going to think you've got a loose screw!
Reply:No. Gifts other than flowers are NOT bestowed upon the family...And the flowers are usually laid at the grave site rather than handing them over to the bereaved as a gift. Also, better check your funeral ettiquette, cause I don't think you're supposed to put a tag with the flowers saying " to (the deceased) , from...." People often send cards via mail. I think the best gift a person can provide is to show up at the funeral and tell the folks sincerly how sorry you are and all that jazz.......and, if you must give them the wine, just tell them it's the blood of Jesus....be sure it's red.
Reply:Totally! I never give flowers to the family or friends of the deceased. I often give a bottle of wine or a gift card to restaurant. That gives the family time to spend together and no worries about dinner that night. I think flowers are just a bad remembrance since they also die.
Reply:When my friend died, I bought a little card that could be put inside his casket. I knew his family was recieving a lot of flowers from everyone so I didn't wanna do that. I don't know if wine would be appropriate...
Reply:Well if he liked it yeah.but if he didnt drink then probly know.and if no the maybe apple sidder.


No comments:

Post a Comment