Saturday, November 14, 2009

Funeral etiquette - flowers etc.?

Sadly my grandma (on my dad's side) passed away this week. The funeral is next Wednesday and tomorrow is the first opportunity I will have to go to the florist, so I'm not sure if they'll arrive on time if sent by the florist. My dad was also a little unsure about where to have them sent to. Is it OK to take the wreath/flowers with me on the day - which would mean taking them to the church service first? I asked my dad and he said this was fine but wasn't sure if it would be viewed as OK by others. Also, I want to write a poem but will not be reading it out at the service. Will it be acceptable to place this down with the flowers? Thanks.

Funeral etiquette - flowers etc.?
As it is a funeral of a member of your family, you can do as you wish. If you want to take the flowers with you, then you can. If you want to get them delivered to the church, or the Funeral Directors, you can. The poem is a lovely idea and of course it can go with the flowers. If the service is next Wednesday, then there is plenty of time for the florist to make up the bouquet/display you want and get it delivered to the funeral directors.





Hope all goes as well as it can.
Reply:You can have them delivered to the funneral home or location. They will have the flowers placed in the room of service. A florist will put a rush job on it if you tell them what the reason the flowers are for. Most flowers are delivered in 24 hours anyways.
Reply:The flowers should get there on time, send them to the funeral home where she is at the moment, they will take them there for you. The poem is a lovely idea, just tuck it inside of the flowers.





I left a poem with my dads flowers when he passed away, quite frankly, at the time, i didnt give a damn what anyone else thought, its what I wanted to do, so I did it.





God bless.


xx
Reply:momo is spot on , the flowers will be sent to the funeral home and if you write a poem it will be totally acceptable to leave it with the flowers ...at times like these etiquette doesn't come into it ..afterall you are grieving .i'm sorry for your loss x
Reply:If you order flowers they usually get sent to the funeral home or the home where the hearse is leaving from. If you tell the florist the date and time, they will get it there in time. Also a poem is a lovely idea.





Sorry for your loss. x
Reply:My condolensences go out to you and your family. You still do have enough time to get the flowers delievered to the funeral home or church. But....if you prefer to take the flowers before the service, and place a poem there also that would fine too. Just make sure you are there in plenty of time where you can do it before people start filing in for services. I think you're idea of writing a poem is very touching and nice. God bless you and your family in this time of need.
Reply:You have my sympathy dear. The florist will send the flower wherever you wish and it is so sweet of you to write a poem. You are a very good person and your Dad will appreciate the effort.
Reply:Hi, Sorry for your loss.





I lost my dad just over 2 years ago... If you want to take the flowers yourself then thats fine and a poem is an excellent idea. I wrote one for my dad. Dont worry about what other people think. Im sure it'll be the last thing on there mind...





take care
Reply:yesyou can take flowers with you on the day lillys are best flowers for funerals ..and they last long......it also depends on what you want you could even carry a single rose
Reply:My grandma passed away last September.





Once you have decided on the flowers, you can get them delivered to the funeral directors, and they will then put them in the hearse that carries the coffin. The funeral cortege will then take them where necessary and will take them to where she will get burried.





You can also then place your poem on the coffin, once she is lowerd into the ground.








Sorry for your loss.
Reply:You will have plenty of time to order flowers and have them sent to the funeral home. Just give them the date and time and they will take care of the rest. As for the poem, it is a great idea. Sorry to hear of the loss of your grandmother.
Reply:Would your grandma like you to bring flowers?
Reply:It's most appropriate to inter a poem with your grandma, actually. My father placed something very special to him in with my mother's mother, and I did the same thing. Anything written may be read, and if it's really between you and your grandmother it's best to keep it private by giving it to her directly.





By the way, have you considered NOT going to a florist? Name your grandmother's favorite charity and ask people do donate there as opposed to flowers. I've noticed it's a growing trend with two benefits: it spreads good deeds and is much easier on grieving allergy sufferers.





Regardless, please accept my condolences. Your concern is touching and impressive.
Reply:Plenty of time to have flowers/wreath delivered from florist to where funeral service is being held. A poem is a great idea and the Florist will be happy to do what you wish with it. Only thing I'd say is to check with whoever is organising the funeral. Sometimes, (especially if it's a cremation) the request may be for "family flowers only" which usually means one huge spray atop the coffin from all the family. There are exceptions, of course.
Reply:First, my condolences to you and your family. I realize that in different parts of the country, things are done differently but here--NC--we call the florist and tell them what we want, by want, it can be a specific flower or price. I, for instance, always want all white arrangements. The florist fixes and delivers them and most of them have someone who goes to the funeral homes each morning and check over the arrangements and replace any flowers that are looking frail. You can take them with you, but I would have them delivered. If you prefer to take them perhaps you could go a bit early and give them to the funeral director who will place them. I understand your not knowing what to do if this is the first funeral you've sent flowers to, but I have finally learned in life to let the professionals handle the details as they know exactly what to do. In this case the florist is being paid to do the flowers and they can advise you. If you don't have a florist the funeral home can suggest several that provide good quality work and some funeral homes have an in house florist.

loops

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